Am I wrong for not wanting to have sex sometimes?

Question

My husband said I don’t put out that much. We have sec maybe once or twice a week… we used to have sex let’s just say 1-2 times a day BEFORE KIDS. 
We have an 11 month old and one on the way. I just found out I’m pregnant again. We also moved away from family so we have absolutely no help at all… I am so exhausted, having to clean around the house, take care of myself, SAHM to our son & a dog mom. My kid is very clingy and my dog as well. My dog is always needy, crying, barking & my son plays by himself for a good time then just wants me with him. I do everything I can to keep him distracted sometimes to be able to do things around the house. 
I clean, I take care of them, I do laundry, I make dinner almost every night (if I’m sick, he’ll pick up dinner).
My husband works 6 days a week and works overtime. Field and & home. So he doesn’t really cook. (No excuse, I know) 
But today he just got a bit sad upset when I didn’t wanna have sex bc I was so tired today. 
I pushed myself the most today (I usually stay home do what I can, bc 1st trimester)
Today I did ALL dishes, cleaned pantry, took our kid for a walk, did the laundry, cleaned my kids todays, washed all his bottles, wiped & dusted all surfaces around the house as more….. 
My husband wants to ask a sex counselor if it’s normal or I just don’t put out…..
I feel like I’m not enough. 
Not enough when I’m sick from this pregnancy and can’t do anything.
Not enough for not having sex. 
Not enough for not paying attention to our dog anymore.
Not enough for myself (haven’t fixed myself up in awhile)
Not enough for my son, when he stays up late and I’m trying my best to be patient with him but ending up losing it because it’s way past his bed time and I’m so so tired.
Just feel like I’m doing it all wrong…
And I’m scared for this next baby…… it honestly was a shock to us but what if I’m just not enough for this baby as well.

Answer

Put out?? He needs to grow up

Answer

Ha! He’d really hate me then! 4 kids and were lucky if it happens twice a month!

Answer

Unpopular opinion I'm sure but i think it's odd when people want to have sex every.single.day. 
I enjoy sex don't get me wrong but there's almost nothing I want to do every day, good included.
If this were my relationship, I'd be concerned at his selfishness. This isn't a you problem is what I'm getting at. I feel like a counselor might tell him that too. If he HAS to have sex every day, that sounds like addiction imo.
You're absolutely not wrong and he shouldn't shame you for it.

Answer

I think it’s important both needs get met.

Answer

There is no normal... everyones normal is different. Id have a realistic convo with him about his expectations. A sex therapist would do the exact same thing and see you have different needs. they wouldnt tell you you should be having x amount of sex. If anything theyd say, never have sex you dont want. Sex should be enjoyable for both parties and the importance of sex varies from person to person. Your needs also arent being met in the grand scheme of things either, you need support, that he clearly doesnt provide or give consideration to.  Sex is not a necessity though, its a desire and it's something that changes throughout a relationship, he clearly hasnt respected that change in the relationship.

Answer

My husband and I definitely struggle sometimes because I have little to no sex drive. I stay at home with our 1 year old and I'm 5 months pregnant. He works his tail off for us. But we work hard at communicating and have sex at least 3 times a week. It's definitely hard some days but we are both understanding and open. I thought marriage wasn't easy. Then we had our first 😂 It's absolutely full time work

Answer

Counseling may really help, not for his sake, but for yours.  It took my husband a while to understand that I’m not in the mood for sex every day.  Especially while pregnant!  He thought it was an insult to him, that I didn’t WANT him.  Not that at all.  Some days I’m just not feeling myself and if I don’t feel sexy and into it, I just can’t get into it and I don’t want to initiate something that I’m just not into that day.  He can tell when I really want it and when I’m just along for the ride.  Some men have that as a love language and when it’s decreased they feel like you’re less interested in them even if that’s 100% not the case.  Something about being a SAHM is mentally exhausting and they don’t quite get that either.  I have to work a day or two a week or my depression gets horrendous.😣

Answer

I think a counselor in general is a great idea! It may help you process a lot of the feelings you're having and maybe help your husband balance out his feelings and what his role in the house needs to develop into

Am I wrong for not wanting to have sex sometimes?

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