Please NO hate...

I dont know who I am anymore I miss the old me happy free loving life enjoying what I want to do. My mental health is draining.

Sorry if it gets long.. being stuck in a 10yr marriage I feel like I don't know if I'm in the wrong... since I been getting treated so badly.

We have kids. We both are in early 30s. But I literally gotta be a parent/mother to my freaking SO.. and teach him what's right or wrong. Im so tired of it very tired. EVERY freaking day. ([ we haven't been sleeping in the same bed for years! Cus im starting to hate him everything annoys me! About him. ])

I gotta wake him up cus he sleeps so late he wakes up in the afternoon since he doesn't want to work anymore. I gotta do everything take kids school cook clean. I gotta beg him to clean. I gotta pick up his shit too im so tired I wanna enjoy my life and not take care of a grown ass man. What would you do? I've talked to him many times everyday im so stressed out I hate it living with him.😭 he doesnt even pay attention to the kids or give them time hes always on his phone like he has someone else.

An example: our 4yr old was coloring on the brand new sofa (that I paid for since he doesnt buy anything)sitting right next to him was his dad!!!!!!! He's into his phone won't freaking pay attention I gotta tell him to tell him to stop im on the other side of the room but see it.

My kids need me!!! They need a happy mommy!!