im a mother of three (first 2 from my first husband)

i have a one month old baby from my current husband who i only recently married and started living with back in september 2021

i realize he lied to me (or downplayed) a lot of things before marriage, like that he doesnt smoke weed (which he does a lot) and that he doesnt drink (which he does).

from the begining or marriage he’s always spent a lot of time away from home at “his friends houses” he says. ive yet to meet his friends that he stays over with in person. ive met one friend/co-worker of his who was a very deliquent young man who ik he had to bail out of jail and has stolen money from him and lies to him and has domestic violence on his record. im concerned about who my husband is around his friends and that maybe i dont really know who he is.

seems his favorite movie is the wolf of wallstreet and that he looks at the main character as a cool or aspirational guy… (idk if youve seen the film but hes a con artist, drug addict, liar, cheater, loves prostitutes etc 🤦🏾‍♀️). and ive also heard him flat out lying to other people on the phone about what hes doing and where he is

anyway, he likes to spend a lot of his time out with his friends, very often overnight. he will leave at night saying hes going to hang out with his friends and not come home until after 3am, 6am, 8am, or just not come home at all…

recently over new years, even though i asked about making plans to do something as a family over the new years weekend because he has those three days off and he responded that he would love that, on new years <a href="https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.glow.android.eve">eve</a> he said hes going to party with his friends and well… he didnt come back for 3 days. he tells me he has his own room at his friends house and he just likes to stay there. he kind of gas lighted me about that whole situation so that i wasnt allow to get upset because he said he was depressed and in a bad place which is why he didnt want to come home, essentially saying its because he didnt want me and the kids to be around his vibe. but he also said he just smoked weed all day and drink beer and slept for thise whole days idk…

more often than not he sleeps at our house only half of the week every week, i cant help but feel like i dont have the whole story or somethings going on

feel free to advice, idk what i can do but just put up with it… especially when expressing my concerns is met with like “YOU should understand my situation and be sympathetic to me, woe is ME” if that makes sense…