What do you consider sexual abuse? I’m so lost on what to do here. Myself and my 2 children live with my boyfriend (we’re expecting our first together and he also has 2 of his own). We get his 11 (almost 12) year old son Saturday/Sunday-Wednesday every week. Last night I thought our boys were in our bedroom with my daughter (she will be 5 next week). My son (12) wasn’t in there but as I turned to walk into the bedroom my daughter is sitting on his sons lap facing towards him on the bed. Immediately his son goes “thank you for the hug” as soon as he sees me. I immediately get a weird vibe and mentioned it to my bf whom didn’t really say much other than “have him leave the room”. I felt like maybe I was over reacting so I kept checking them. (my son was touched by a minor family member when he was about my daughters age). I checked on them several more times. At one point my daughter was genuinely hugging him and the last time they were getting under the covers together (not fully). At that point I again quietly went and checked on them and he again gets that nervous weird tone vibe and says “I thought you wanted to lay down and get under the covers”. I’m definitely not comfortable and we make the boys go to bed to their room (my daughter sleeps in her toddler bed in our room because she’s not use to the steps yet). When I tucked my daughter in and gave her a kiss goodnight like I always do, she proceeds to try and stick her younger in my mouth. I immediately react and tell her how gross that is and that we don’t do that (in a nice tone). She then says “that’s what (my boyfriends son) showed me. My bf hears this and says “he did not do that”. She went to sleep pretty quickly but I found myself thinking about it the majority of the night and then again immediately after I woke this morning. I asked her when she woke up what happened with her and my bfs son last night and she says “we kissed and hugged and licked”. I asked her where they licked and she points to her neck and says they used tongue in the mouth. My almost 5 year old has NEVER said anything like this so I do really believe he was inappropriate with her. How do I approach this?? Is this sexual abuse from another minor?? I thought it was weird that a 12 year old would be hanging out with a 5 year old but my son goes in there with her a lot. The difference being you can actually hear them loudly playing in there and I have to get onto them. I don’t know how to approach this with my bf and him actually believe it freaking happened. I do know that child will NOT be allowed to be alone with my daughter ever again. Someone please give me some insight. My heart is broken and I don’t know how to approach this.