Is this normal?

Question

This is a genuine question. Me and my bf have our first baby and he’s 4 months. I’m a sahm because he didn’t want me to work anymore and we don’t trust our baby with anyone. He basically pays all the bills and supports me and our baby, thankfully we live somewhere where we don’t have to pay rent so that helps us a lot. Is it normal that he gets bothered when I ask him to help me with our baby? Like if I’m really sleepy I ask for him to watch him for about 1 hour just so I can take a nap and get all my energy back. He tries to give me a dirty look and it gets me very angry, he just ignores me and lets it be. He doesn’t do anything for him like feed him, put him to sleep, wash his bottles etc. Unless I ask him to. I feel like he thinks he shouldn’t help me since he’s the one supporting us.  So my question is, is it ok for him to be this way? I never ask him for anything unless I really need his help. It’s making me feel different about him because he never asks to hold our child when he comes home from work as if he didn’t miss him. Am I wrong?
Reading all theses comments is making me tear up. I’ve been dealing with this since my baby was a newborn, he helped at the beginning but then stopped for some reason. I am going to have a conversation about it with him without getting mad, I think I’m willing to say that if he doesn’t help with his part I am leaving, my son doesn’t need a father dad doesn’t show interest in him 😞 The saddest part is that it took us so long to conceive our baby and we saw him as a blessing.

Answer

No. It’s not ok, and don’t have another baby with him.

Answer

Just because he works doesn’t mean he should help raid HIS child. That’s not right at all. 
I’m a SAHM. My husband has to sleep in another room right now since she’s so young. But when he gets home he’s tired. I still hand her to him so I can get some of my stuff done. 
He chose to have a child so he needs to step up.

Answer

No, it is not ok. For one, it’s not “help” because it takes two to tango! He’s accountable to do his part. I’m not for asking someone to do a job they’re suppose to be doing… but you should definitely have a talk about your concerns & where his actions may lead your family. He have to comprehend that you cannot pour into your child if you’re empty. 
I’m a SAHM (3 yrs) also, we chose this option for the same reasons. I dealt with PPD & my husband asked for a lay off just so he could do his part with our newborn. We have 2 now. He comes home from work, showers & immediately starts picking up wherever I left off & tells me “baby, do whatever you need to. I got it.” By the time I’m out the shower, the house is clean & the children are taken care of. ❤️ You didn’t make the baby on your own, regardless of what he pays for… he asked you to do this, he SHOULD be supporting you. It’s his obligation.

Answer

No it’s not okay and this is gross

Answer

Nope, not normal..

Answer

No that is not normal, he sees you as a babysitter, that is your job, that you have the audacity to ask him to do anything, on the contrary my brother is the a
Epitome of a husband and a partner. We used to call him the baby whisperer. My brother would grocery shop, change diapers, you name it. He would send his wife to get her nails done or a massage, he would watch the baby with no problem, give her a break, and support her, she took two years off and stayed home with the babies had a second baby while she was home. Hired nannies, cleaning lady to come to the house, and even now that the girls are 13 and 14, she still says I don’t know what I would do without him, he cooks like a chef, he takes care of her parents and cooks for them as well, he manages the money, they go on multiple vacations a year, they are a complete partnership. And that’s what a relationship is supposed to be. Whether you work or you stay home, it’s supposed to be a complete partnership. That he helps out at home, that he change his diapers, gives you a break, appreciates you, values you as a person and as a mother, not that you are his maid Who is beneath him and I have the audacity to ask him to watch the baby so you can take a nap or bathe or anything else. Everyone is entitled to a break, and escape from reality, some pampering, etc. what your partner is doing is not normal, it’s not acceptable behavior, and you need to have a talk with him, or this is not the relationship for you￼￼

Answer

Nope. He may work, but so do you. When you’re both home, parenting is 50/50. If he didn’t want the responsibility, he should have had sex with you. 🤷‍♀️

Answer

You're not in the wrong. People think looking after a baby is easy until they have to do it themselves. Working is easier which is why I went back to full-time work - my kids love daycare.

Answer

Are you guys super young? Because, this sounds like immaturity. 🚩

Answer

No its not ok. And if in were you id talk to him about the fact he is a parent and needs to spend time with his child. If he can not then you need to show him how much day care fees will be and what a schedule will look like with him caring for his child while u work too.  That way u get a break and he shares responsibilities. Men like this u shouldnt put yourself in a dependent position to

Is this normal?

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