Bittersweet feeling…

I just had my second, and last, baby. We only ever wanted two and have no desire to have more children. I’m very happy with this decision and can’t imagine us changing our minds.

But…

I can’t help but feel so sad every time my youngest hits a new milestone! He just outgrew his newborn clothes and as I packed them away to donate I can’t help thinking “this is the last time I will ever have a new born.” “This is the last time I will be seeing this new born hat.” “This is the last time he will have ‘a first smile/ coo/ etc.”

Don’t get me wrong, I love that my first is independent and I love watching her grow and learn new things, and become the person she’s meant to be. It just all feels so bittersweet to know that one day they won’t be my babies, won’t nap in my arms, and there will be a final time I pick them up before they go on to live their own lives. Hopefully with happiness, and on their own terms.

Does anyone else feel this way or is it just the postpartum hormones?