I messed up today. Maybe it was the lack of sleep, or maybe cause I haven’t eaten a real meal in the last two days, or maybe it was because today was the last straw in the bucket for my mental health… UGH. Bring on the mom guilt.

So today I brought my kids (3 years and 8 months) to the play gym in town. I have horrible social anxiety and from now on will only be going when i know it’s not too busy… so anyways, my daughter and son were fine playing, we were there for about an hour. I noticed both of them starting to get tired and the place start to get very busy so I tell my daughter we will be leaving in 15 min. When time came around to leave she absolutely refused to listen to me. She started to run away from me, flail around, scream at me and then finally try and hit me… all indicators to me that she is EXHAUSTED now and also obviously mad we had to leave. So I picked her up and told her we have to leave now, it’s ej’s (her brother) nap time and he needs rest, we can come back tomorrow. She agreed so I set her down and then when we walked to the front she asked for a chocolate milk, I was going to get her one when she darts to the end of the store and again refused to come back to me after several attempts. So in the end, I picked her up and just walked out of the play gym with my son and her in my arms. I could feel the eyes of judgement but honestly my anxiety just took over. I know I should’ve been more patient and worked through it with her better but today was just not my day, so, as I sit here in guilt and anxiety about returning… Please tell me I’m not the only one who’s had these moments and also, if you have, how I can I be more patient in the future…

signed,

the lost her patience big time mom.