Am I wrong to be upset and say I won’t ever leave my kids with my in laws again?

Question

So I have never had a good relationship with my in laws, they’re kinda apathetic towards me and have never made a point to get to know me. To them I am just the person that is married to their son. They have done a few various things that have made me not trust them. For one they both have alcoholism so it’s hard to really trust them to begin with. But when I was deployed a few years ago (military) and my husband was also separately deployed, they had POA of our vehicles and possessions. They took good care of my husband’s truck and things but my stuff they “accidentally” left the door cracked to my storage unit for 6 months and moisture, bugs and rats got inside and destroyed nearly everything. They also said my car “randomly exploded” when they tried to drive it. Like the engine exploded. I have no idea how that happened. It cost us thousands of $$ in damages and they never apologized. They have done a few other things too that have made me not trust them but it’d be forever to type out. 
Anyway. Yesterday for Father’s Day my husband wanted to at least visit his dad. I said okay because we haven’t seen them since November. We were just planning on staying a few hours since they live 3 hours away. They live in the country in a very small mobile home so most time is spent outside when we are there. They had bought the kids (4 and 2) a bunch of toys and the kids were very happily playing but it was super hot. My MIL suggested “why don’t you and Tom (my husband) go run by Family Dollar and get a sprinkler for the kids? We’ll watch them, it’ll only take 30 minutes.” I hesitated but then again it was just down the road and the kids would have a blast in a sprinkler. 
So I agreed even though I was very nervous. They had never been left alone with my kids before but it’s just 30 min right? And they weren’t drinking. Well in that span of time they did not watch the kids and my 4 year old fell in a 6 foot ditch and got cut up by branches and twigs. My 2 year old fell off their picnic bench onto a rock and has a massive bruise on his back. At least this is what they told me happened. For one the ditch they said he fell into is probably 300ft from their house. So why was he out there playing by himself? Why was my 2 year old unattended on a bench? They both have  injuries and my MIL was just laughing about it like it’s funny like “oh they’re so clumsy! It was kinda funny!” I kinda snapped and was like “this is why I don’t trust y’all with anything. In thirty minutes they both have pretty serious injuries”. Now EVERYONE is mad at me, even my husband who thinks “accidents happen” and it’s not a big deal. Meanwhile my 4 year old has cuts all up and down his body and face and my 2 year old has a bruise the size of my hand on his back. 
Am I wrong?

Answer

Different people parent differently, especially from previous generations. "Watching the kids" to some means you also keep the kids out of trouble, others it means youre just an adult body present in case of serious emergency. We are pretty protective, but I grew up pretty free-range...we had a lake in the back of our house with alligators (Florida) and at 4 yeah I kinda remember being out back with my brother mostly on our own for quite awhile. Where I live now, kids as young as 5 or 6 roam the neighborhood, we dont allow it, but some do and many parents have told us we are too protective. Especially if they parented as alcoholics, they probably had  a 'nothing bad will happen' mentality. So now you know you cant leave your kids unattended with them, next time you stay and he can do the errand, or vice versa.

Answer

No, absolutely not, my kids would never be left alone or out of eye sight again. 
I do not play about my babies being hurt.

Answer

WTF. I'd be livid!! You are not wrong an your hubby should be just as pissed my man woulda flipped his shit on his momma an her S/O!

Answer

I have an alcoholic in law. While yours seems bad, at least she didn’t let your 2 year old out near a busy highway and not realize he was missing only to find him later a few houses down in a neighbors house. Or get so drunk while babysitting she couldn’t even get off the couch to let us in the door when we went to pick them up. Your kids getting hurt could have happened with you there. Especially the one falling off the bench, that one I will say kids are clumsy, also maybe they aren’t used to watching kids since they’ve never watched yours and forget how fast 4 year olds are and didn’t think he’d be that far away. I’m not making excuses for them, you’re totally justified to not trust them to watch your kids. But I don’t think what they did was ill intended, just kind of negligent. They maybe didn’t deserve to be snapped at but something you could have talked to your husband about in private after you left, “hey, I’m really not comfortable with your parents watching the kids alone anymore so please don’t put us in that situation again. And if it does come up you need to be the one to tell them no since they’re your parents” something like that would have been better than you snapping at them like that, though I understand you were upset and it’s hard to control things in the moment.

Answer

Not wrong at all. if I had and come back to that, I would’ve lost my shit. We do not allow my son around my husbands family period because of this same behavior.

Answer

Not wrong at all, I’d be beyond livid. Never let them near my kids unless I was with them the entire time

Answer

They would never be left alone in the same room as my children again. They’re obviously not capable.

Am I wrong to be upset and say I won’t ever leave my kids with my in laws again?

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