Help or advice

I had a extremely traumatic experience with my ex trying to get me pregnant forever ago . Now I’m paranoid about having any kind of sexual interaction so please don’t make fun . I have a huge fear of getting pregnant currently. The guy I’ve been seeing I’ve been making him wait to have sex and still haven’t . He’s been really responsible and not penetrating me or anything . He just made it to where I’m going to freak out all day today unfortunately . So first things first I’m on birth control . Have been for some months now , I just worry because I really don’t want to get pregnant once again . Last night he tried to keep setting the tip on it & he came on the outside of my underwear . I’m doing my best trying to be logical about it & not freak out but I am . Any words of wisdom would help immensely right now .