Tw I will talk briefly about mental health issues such as depression.

To all parents out there. Please watch what you say to you children. I know children often forget stuff easily such as chores that you may have asked them to do. They may even annoy you at times. But let me tell you, mean and hurtful things, they stay forever. Please try your hardest to be kind. I don’t care what happened at work, your child didn’t cause it, I don’t care what you’re arguing about with your spouse or SO, your child isn’t responsible for that. Don’t drag them down with you. Don’t drag your children into your arguments, that forces them to choose a side. My parents did this and more. I told my dad I wanted to become a biologist when I was 12, he laughed and said good luck with that. My parents would constantly drag me into their arguments with “he said “this” didn’t he” or “did you hear your mother say blah”. My mom would constantly tell me “if I can’t do it, then you definitely can’t”, thankfully I wouldn’t listen I was almost always able to do whatever it was. My dad had me carrying 50 pound bags of animal feed when I was seven ( I only weighed 54 pounds then) because “you have to learn to do it yourself”. I watched my dad shatter my Nintendo ds by throwing it hard against our brick fire place, why, because I told a lie. What was this lie? I had accidentally hurt my little sister and was afraid I would get in trouble so I lied saying I didn’t hurt her when I was asked why she was crying. My dad dragged my out of the shower and beat me down the hallway with a large yard stick length paint stick and continued to beat me in my room. I was covered in bruises the next day and had to wear long jean pants to school so no one would notice them. It was because I took too long in the shower one too many times. I was in elementary school still. I was not allowed to talk at the dinner table, I couldn’t even ask for ketchup because I was interrupting and my dad would slam his fist on the table knocking over everything standing on the table. Then I would get yelled at to the point of crying. This was an every night occurrence. He became a mean alcoholic when I was 14 or 15 and I developed depression. I started having minor but unpleasant thoughts too. I didn’t think I could explain this to my mom without crying the whole time so I wrote her a note and had her read it. I was crying while she read it. She didn’t even finish it and she said, and I quote word for word, “suck it up or go to a mental hospital”. I haven’t talked about my depression with anyone except close friends now. My dad then dragged my into another argument between him and my mom and apparently chose the wrong side (ps this was over going to church on Easter morning) and it ended with him telling me “I hope you are a single mother one day and all your children are scared of you. He wasn’t drunk when he said this. He has also never apologized for it. He also told me during my teen years that I was the problem to all my parents arguments. That made me feel just amazing 🥲. As if my depressed mind wasn’t already telling me this. I am no longer very close with him. I’m on okay terms with my mom but sometimes I want nothing to do with her. This lead to me being in an abusive relationship and my boyfriend raped me. You can imagine what that did to my depression. I am still struggling but there are days I want to run away and never come back. Only problem, I love my siblings. I’m the eldest and I’m ten years apart of the next eldest. The youngest one I saw as my own child (he is 4) and love him. Please watch what you say. You might not realize that this word will stay forever, but I’m telling you they do. Word really do cut deeper than a knife. Love your children and please be kind.