Useless husband

We have two kids, almost 2 and 3 months.

Our almost two year old son is autistic.

On Saturday my husband tested positive for covid. He caught it at work. The kids and I tested positive on Sunday. The kids and I have had it pretty bad. High fevers, cough, lung congestion, nose congestion, headaches. My husband laid in bed I disturbed for an entire day when he felt sick. He said he felt better by yesterday and was actively doing pointless unhelpful crap around our home, like decluttering pots and pans.

We moved into a three bedroom apartment four months ago while our house is being built. And we live upstairs. My two year old has taken to screaming the house down and kicking on the floor and almost through my bedroom door, when I leave the room to try and put my youngest down to sleep. I obviously can’t let him do this so I have to stop what I’m doing to go try calm him down. No distractions work. No tv, no ipad, no books, no toys, nothing. If he can’t see me for even a second he loses it. Regardless, the screaming and kicking at the door causes my youngest to wake up and the process starts all over again. I’ve been up since 2am today with two very sick kids, feeling awful myself. My husband (who feels better, his words,) yelled at me this morning because the noise woke him up. He’s in quarantine from work right now so it’s not like he had to worry about getting up at a certain time. I told him to grow up out of frustration because he was doing absolutely nothing to help me. He then turns to me and tells me this isn’t the life he wanted and he never asked for an autistic child. He loves him but he can’t stand the screaming anymore and because of the that he’s refusing to help me, so I can either leave or stay and deal with it and “shut the f**k up”. He then put ear plugs in and went back to bed.

Toddler went to sleep on the couch at 9am. I thought I would finally get the baby to sleep at that point. Just as the baby is nodding off the toddler wakes up, sees I’m not in eye sight and runs to the door to kick and scream, waking the baby. I burst into tears at that point. I feel so sick and have absolutely no help and the helplessness I feel when I can’t even lie my baby down is so disheartening. Husband woke up, saw me crying and rolled over and went back to sleep. It’s now 3PM!!! And he’s still asleep. I have yet to be able to put the baby down in his crib without my toddler noticing and I can’t stop crying. The baby is so beyond tired. Advice or kind words would be greatly appreciated.