Ashamed/guilty/don’t judge

Honestly y’all I feel like such a slut I literAlly masturbated to a guy who doesn’t like me at all we HU once I feel so dumb and ashamed it’s jus like I’m such a fucking airhead I feel dumb bc this boy rejected me in the worst way he doesn’t like me at alll idk why I masturbated to him like I jus idk I feel so bad, he traumatized me so badly he’s part of the reason why I don’t participate in certain sexual , I literally just masturbated and whole heartily squirted to this boy I must be a slut like there’s something wrong with me . Bc I feel so bad that I still think about him in that way I feel like im being tested