Stressed out about blw

Really feeling stressed out about getting my son eating solid foods.

He started weaning late at about 9months. Before that he still had his tongue thrust. So now I'm struggling with how I'm going to get him up to 3 meals a day by 1

We're going baby led because he literally won't let me spoon feed him at all just refuses to open his mouth if I come anywhere near him with a spoon.

This is also challenging because it means I can't give him cereal or yoghurt or anything, he really wants to take the spoon himself but that just ends up with him flinging all the food off the spoon and putting it in his mouth when it's empty.

He will put solids on his mouth but then I can't help but wonder how much of it he's actually eating, like nothing ever gets fully finished. If I give him say toast cut up into slices he mostly just gums each slice.

I know food before 1 is just for fun but then at what point does he actually NEED to be eating properly??

He still drinks a lot of milk too like 40oz a day and I feel like if he's actually eating food that should be decreasing now he's 10 months old?

He was a preemie though so he's still only 9months old corrected.

Any tips/advice/reassurance would really be appreciated