When does divorce/separation feel real?

I feel like I'm on an emotional labor vacation. I'm lucky enough to have a grandmother who needed a very light duty overnight caretaker (not much needed of me most the time) and I'm looking for another job so I don't entirely depend on them but...

It just doesn't feel real a lot of the time? Feels like its a temporary nice vacation of emotional stability and that it'll to go back to how it was before (even though I'm not going back)