My husband and I tried for 6 months for baby number 2 and decided to stop. To our surprise I randomly tested in June and got a positive. I was so excited!!! I have infertility issues and a bunch of medical conditions. With our daughter we tried for almost 2 years and even saw specialist and I took medications. (She’ll be 2 next week). Anyway so we got a positive and were excited because we wanted a boy. I went to my 7 week appointment and the baby was fine they said. Heart rate 156. I had a subchorionic bleed but the doctor said it was small and they usually heal on their own. I was sent to high risk for my other illnesses for my 10 week appointment. Everything was fine the tech and I were laughing and talking and she got quiet. She asked when was my last ultrasound so I told her three weeks prior and she said “I’m not getting a heart beat and baby was measuring 9weeks. I’d had headaches and back pain days leading up to my appointment but thought nothing of it. I used a Doppler the night before with my best friend who’s a nurse and didn’t hear anything but we figured it was too early. My heart ripped from my chest. My sweet baby was gone. Everyday since than has been hell for me. Crying and feeling sad. I’m so grateful for my sweet vibrant girl but to lose a child hurts so much. We had testing done on the baby after the DNC and learned it was indeed our sweet boy. He had trisomy 21 and it caused his little heart to stop. He had 47 chromosomes. We started trying again this month but I am honestly terrified and confused as to if I want to continue trying. I just feel lost and broken. I feel like it’s my fault because I didn’t go to the ER for the headaches and back pain.