I'm breaking!! I just feel like I made a bad decision. This year I chose to leave my husband, he was very toxic and abusive.

I left back in January, I thought this year would be my year. I thought I would be on my feet by now. My brother and I got an apt together. I was working this shitty gas station job. Till it closed... Back in June, I had a really bad seizure, I was pretty sure I was having them before.

I was diagnosed with epilepsy

I had many seizures in June and July, I was hospitalized a lot. I can't drive anymore. Finding a job is difficult. I was told by my case worker I should apply for disability. Even though I don't think I will get approved I went ahead and tried.

So my case worker also told me about this Christian company that helps ppl with bills. I went there to see if they could help me with November's rent. I filled out a piece of paper. They gave me a list of stuff they needed from me. I got all that stuff turned in a few days later. I then get a phone call from them adding more things. I got those things turned in. They just kept adding things. Last week I had a big seizure and was hospitalized. I missed a phone call from them. I told them I was in the hospital. They said I was lying. I made it clear I would never lie about that. My medical records were sent to them. They again added more stuff they need from me. I then get it in and they said we were good. That someone would call me Wednesday to make appt.

I had a lady call me yesterday, she was mean. Telling me that there is no way I live off the income I have. And that I need to get a high-paying job. She was like don't you want to buy a car or a house. Or go shopping. Then I told her I can't drive, I have to go a year free. She told me that wasn't true. That was an excuse so I can get on to disability. That I need to find a job. So my kids can get toys and go on vacation. I never said I didn't want a job, I apply to them all the time. When she gave me stay-at-home jobs. I went a filled some applications out. But then she also said I didn't sound like I had a disability at all. I could go on. So I wasn't surprised when today she called and told me they weren't going to help me. They said I didn't turn in all the info they needed..they didn't like the review I left so they sent this

They had info from tanf, when you do tanf you have to do a job search program, and you have to put in 35 hours of job application in a week. They got all that proof. My brother and I have split all the bills here. I just need help with the November rent... I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm going to not make it. For the first time, I thought maybe just ending my life would be better, or going back to my husband... I'm writing this because I have no one to talk to or rant to... 😥😥😥😥