I left my job as a TA last Monday because I was having a hard time personally and going to work for 45 hours a week (40 working) in such a hard just was too much. It’s a Montessori school. The age group I worked with was 18 months - 3 years old.

Most of the parents asked me to babysit their kiddos. I was happy to because I love them. So, last night was my first time.

My old student (3 years old) was throwing a tantrum so I tried picking him up but he yelled no while I was doing it. So I asked if he wanted me to put him down (I wasn’t sure if it was because of what he was throwing the tantrum about). He said yes. I then did that thing where you pretend you’re gonna drop them and go “woahhhh” to cheer him up. He decided that out of every single time I’ve done that and he laughed, that this one time (around his parents) he was gonna scream. 😭😭 It looked SO BAD!! I immediately put him down and said to the dad “normally that works”. He looked so awkward.

And then he hid my keys when I was putting their baby sister down and we could not find them at all. We looked for AN HOUR before they Ubered me home. I’m so mortified. I have social anxiety so this is too much for me. I’m going back this morning to get them. They’re still looking.

Edit: Thank you so much!! I went through something traumatic recently which made all my old anxiety issues come out. I’ve worked with kids for years and never had these problems but that was a good thought. I appreciate the reassurance. I just forgot how to deal with anxiety 😭 I’m going to go back on medication soon 🤞🏻🤞🏻