Body dysmorphia, and possible eating disorder

I was being attacked for how I looked ever since I’ve gone through puberty around 9 years old. My under bust is 32 my over was 40. My waist is usually a 27-30 inch and my hips are 42, I’m also 4’11 and 21 years old. I started having problems with myself and my diet now due to it. It’s very hard for me to admit because as I got older people started to tell me that I’m beautiful, even at times I’ll still get criticized. After I eat I would immediately feel nauseous and upset, at some days I would even want to avoid food or eat several times a day just to. I even start to get upset about looking at my body in a mirror, when I get reminded of things that people used to say to me as a child I would start to shake and feel sick. I’m scared to tell anyone about this because people always take it as a joke or would even get mad at me for saying anything. I’m trying to find ways to help myself.

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