Undecided on feeding

I had an extremely hard time breastfeeding with my first kiddo. He didn’t seem to get much and wouldn’t gain weight. I ended up pumping exclusively (but not very successfully) after the first two weeks and stopped completely by 4 months. Now that I’m pregnant with boy #2, I’m unsure I want to try again. I thought I might try breastfeeding in hospital and pump once I get home. But my breasts get so big (36H now, normally I or J when feeding), and my back hurts so bad. It really doesn’t help the post-baby depression when I’m hurting so bad and my clothes don’t fit.

Things got so much better when we did formula and I stopped breastfeeding and pumping all together. I’m trying to decide if I just colostrum feed and then go to formula or if I should try sticking it out a bit longer this time, or just keep trying as long as I can. Any suggestions?