New mama struggling with c-section. Need to rant

Hello ladies! Im not even sure why im making this post, maybe I just need some advice or words of encouragement as im struggling to cope. I was scheduled for a c-section on Oct 11, but just delivered my mono-di twins on Sept 29th due to pre-eclampsia at 35 weeks and 4 days. They are currently in the NICU due to having issues breathing and were whisked away before I could even see them. My fiancee and I got to see them yesterday and do skin to skin, but I was not prepared to see them hooked up to all the tubes and wires. I am by no means a emotional person, I rarely cry. But ive been crying nonstop lately, I just want my boys next to me and off of those machines already. I fully understand that its required for them to recover and be happy and healthy babies, but im just feeling so impatient and irrational. I cant tell if its just the hormones or what, but i feel like im loosing my mind. The ladies here at the hospital are so nice and understanding and told me I can visit them at anytime, but its so painful just getting out of bed to get into a wheelchair. This is my 3rd day in the hospital and no one told me recovery would be so rough! I typically have a high pain tolerance, but lord have mercy, this is the worse pain I've ever experienced in my life! Of course I knew it was going to be painful, as its a major abdominal surgery, but I wasn't expecting this. I almost lost my mind on my MIL when she came to visit because she had the audacity to tell me "you c-section mamas have it easy! At least you didnt have to push out a watermelon sized baby out of your who-ha! It cant be THAT painful". I feel like no one talks about the pain that comes with c-sections because its seen as a "easy way out" over traditional vaginal births when it is clearly NOT the case. My stomach is cramping so much, the incision burns horribly when I walk to the bathroom assisted. I cant pass gas without stomach pain, yet it makes the pain worse if I don't. I cant even lift my own legs to get back into bed. Not to mention I havent produced any milk yet and it's just making me feel like im failing already. I respect anyone who has given birth, no matter the method. Women are like super heros with what our bodies can do! I just dont understand how some of you mamas make it look so easy and effortless, y'all are true warriors! I feel like a huge baby with how much im struggling to cope. How did you ladies get through the first few weeks?? I have a very supportive and helpful fiancée, but of course he will never fully understand what its like to go through this. I just want to hold them constantly and not let go