medication mishap, hospital nightmare

today was a fucking day. buckle up. yesterday i told my psychiatrist i’m pregnant and he said that legally he can no longer see me anymore?? even though i can’t figure out where that’s a thing. so i’ve been panicked, scrambling to find a psychiatrist in 48 hours because at that point my meds would run out in that amount of time. meds i’ve been on for 3+ years that saved my life and kept me stable. i was unbelievably sick with stress. so yesterday and this morning i’m researching psychiatrists who are booked out for MONTHS and i’m crying and i completely messed up my sleep schedule because of it.

this is where it really all goes to hell. because my sleep was messed up and my mind was so frazzled, i messed up on my meds. taking them at midnight and again in the morning. immediately call poison control, then 911, then go to the hospital. i’m terrified i’m gonna die or that i’ve hurt my baby and mind you i’ve been on medications since i was about 10 and this had NEVER HAPPENED. so i spend 10 hours in the hospital, blood tests are run, i’m hooked up to an ekg the entire time… real fun stuff. luckily, all is well and i’m home now and it’s not a cause of concern for baby. in fact they tested my hcg levels while i was there and they’re at 1600! which is just above the median level for 5w1d:) also above the level needed to see something on an ultrasound now🥹

i now have an appointment with an ob tomorrow who will hopefully deal with my medication management… god i hope, lol. if anyone has any psychiatrists in seattle, please send them my way because this was a shitshow

anyways, no point to this other than to vent and say fuck my psychiatrist because this was not fun and also i’m getting a pill planner because i literally have health anxiety so taking too much of a medication and going to the hospital was not a thrill!

still shaken up and a bit on edge but thankful me and baby are okay. i am exhausted lmao so i’m gonna get some rest! hope your day was less eventful than mine:)