I’m having a really hard time and I’m starting to slowly lose my sanity as it seems like there is absolutely nothing that helps.

I have a two year old boy. At first I thought we were just hitting the terrible twos, but idk if this is normal. He gets these episodes where he’s just completely zoned out. Screaming non stop to the point where if someone heard, I honestly believe they would think abuse is going on. He lashes out or hurts himself when you try to intervene, change of rooms or change of anything doesn’t help either. Trying to distract him makes it worse, trying to console makes it worse, trying to talk to him makes it worse. He just stands or lays there staring off into space while screaming his head off. When you look at him he’ll look back, but almost as if he’s just looking right past you. The best way to describe it is almost like he’s possessed at the time. These are lasting anywhere from 15-20 mins, however, our longest battle was 40ish mins. It’s almost like he needs to tire himself out before he calms down enough to be able to do anything. They’re also starting to happen more frequently now. Most notable times are right from waking up in the morning and waking up from his nap. Since about 15 months he has also been getting night terrors.

I just want to break down and cry when it happens. It hurts so much watching going through these episodes. Especially when he starts hurting himself and me holding him from doing it just makes it worse.

This is my first child so it’s all completely new territory. Is this just what tantrums and “terrible twos” are like? Is this abnormal? Should I talk to a doctor about this?

Online hasn’t been much help. I did find a few things about oral ties. My son does have a top lip tie that we never had fixed when he was born because our midwife told us to wait and see if it’ll affect anything which at the time it wasn’t. He also does tend to sleep with his mouth open regardless of how often we close it for him. I don’t know if these can be connected (based on one article I saw) or if it’s just totally unrelated.

I’m just at loss at what to do and any advice would be greatly appreciated.