TW violence

You guys, I’ve had enough of this abuser I’ve been with. I feel trapped. Can’t tell the courts he’s an abuser because they will judge me. This is MY abuser, not my child’s. That’s the difference, but when a child is involved, they don’t play around when it comes to abuse. I’ve been in this situation a long time so there’s things I’ve learned along the way that has influenced my “excuses” for not leaving.

He hates me. He can’t see it clearly, but he absolutely hates me. I know when a person don’t like me. They treat me bad, don’t respect my wishes, just all around don’t care. And I’ve had enough of this. I can’t live like this anymore. I’m tired of cleaning up after a grown ass man, I’m tired of living with a grown ass man who only plays games on his phone. He doesn’t associate at all. He doesn’t care. But I’m also in an abusive relationship. Yeah I’m so dumb.

I just wanna say I feel very unsafe for MY life but he won’t let me out with my child. And I can’t leave my child. I just can’t. He will tell the courts I’m abandoning my child, when I don’t. I stay at home with him. We do our own thing. I’m very disoriented right now, my mind is racing so fast. I can’t focus on any one thing. I’m just all around tired and tired of being with someone who doesn’t give a damn about me.

My body was legit shaking. I do have epilepsy and said you guys about to send me in a seizure. This dude acted like a fish and said I hope you do. He doesn’t give a damn about me or our shared child.

He can go live his old life with his old friends and be his old ass self. I’m good. I will take care of my child and move on with my life. But leaving my child is something I cannot do.