The title is a little dramatic. I mean, technically I did drop out... 7 years ago. I don't think you can "drop out" if you didn't start your classes yet.

I was considering going back to school for biomedical engineering at 28 because I love science. I live on family property so now would be a decent time to start. Then my grandma died and I think I was overcompensating and scheduled classes online (more than one) I work full time and barely have time for my current projects.

I realized I think I was running to school because I was scared. Academia is a comfort to me, something that is kmown to me and something I know I can succeed in.

My grandma was the only one who supported and believed in my ability to be a creative someday. I finished a YA novel in 2023 and am currently editing (plus writing about 5 extra chapters for characterization, flow, and to change to a much more satisfying ending that gives the "standalone with series potential" that publishers are looking for and that readers love)

I think I ran to school scared of if I was wrong about this. If I couldn't be an author and if no one would ever read my work.

Since I never started courses, I just don't think it's the right time. If I'm going to put myself on a limb with a novel, I think I have to do it now. Classes are always available next term once i finish editing and querying.

Grandma was the only person to look me in my eyes and see my soul. Although she thought school was a grand idea, she constantly told me I needed to finally put my stories out there.

I think I need to just be confident and concentrate on that outside work. I already finished the damn novel, I cant just jump into school because I'm too scared of failure to finish the process. I think i just needed to put this out in the world to believe in what im doing, though that seems silly. Thanks for reading.