Emotionally unstable bf: What should I do?

I been dating this guy for 2 years now and he still hasn’t changed. I communicate my needs of just wanting reassurance when I tell him something upsets me. He’s extremely emotionally unavailable and automatically starts defending himself asking “why are u like this? Why do you need validation?” And so on. It’s literally the opposite of what I need when I feel upset and vulnerable . Makes me feel worse and bad about myself for feeling that way. It gets to a point where I start crying and he continues to attack me just for expressing how I felt that I wanted reassurance on. It’s tough because I do want to break up but attachment is there. I’ve never been reassurances properly and genuinely. It takes me crying and begging for him to say an I love you and to be gentle and calm. Makes me feel like I should just never bring up what upsets me anymore because he can’t ever handle it. Am I being crazy or is he just really not ready to be a bf/husband in the long run? Do you think men like this will ever change? Even if he were to be dating a new girl? I’ve been extremely patient and been debating if I should just leave or not but I love him too much and let it hurt me.. it’s so hard. Does he really love me if he could sit there and watch me cry and not do anything rather just yell? It’s painful