This morning i couldn’t stop thinking about this. And wanted to share with the community.

No one tells you the ugly side of pregnancy, but especially the ugly side of miscarriage. I had a complete miscarriage in my home in July 13 2023, I was 11 weeks 5 days. I was using the bathroom. I’m now 7 weeks pregnant and still have the previous miscarriage hanging over my head. Every time I use the bathroom I’m checking the toilet paper and looking at toilet bowl to see if there is anything odd. It’s a fear that I don’t think you get over.

I also feel guilty, why did the first one not succeed? Could I have done something differently? Both questions are unanswered because the truth is no one knows why miscarriages happen. With this second pregnancy I want to open myself up and unconditionally love this little thing growing, which I do love whole heartedly. But it’s like I’m expecting the other shoe to drop. I know in time I will be completely comfortable and I know it’s in Gods hands.

I write this because I know there are people out in the world that feel the same as I do. Just know you are not alone. Always feel free to speak what your heart is saying.