Was I wrong for saying this?

I have a cousin who works from home full time, has a son who’s 2 and not speaking (hasn’t been diagnosed with anything as of yet but autism is highly suspected), and she has a husband who goes to school. So my cousin while working from home, will take time off every Tuesday from work to take her son to speech therapy, she takes her son to the park on her lunch, she makes dinner, she cooks, cleans, and her husband doesn’t do absolutely anything, he get home from school and will lock himself in his office literally. The son is enrolled in gymnastics for social reasons and even when her husband has time off from school to go he doesn’t, he will also skip speech therapy when he’s full able to go. She has been trying to work with the son a lot at home and when her husband has the son he just puts YouTube on for him and sits there in his phone. My cousin is trying to teach the son sign language, but her husband doesn’t practice it with him at all or know any signs or any skills their supposed to be practicing with him bc he doesn’t know what the speech therapist recommends since he never goes. She lives out of state because her husband was in the military so she doesn’t have any support nearby. She’s always complaining to me how he doesn’t do anything and just complains about everything he doesn’t do. So she texted me yesterday saying that when her husband got home from school he went go sleep so she had to feed, bathe, and put their son down for bed by herself. I responded saying if she wanted things to change she needed to check him, it’s been going on for a long time and all she does it complain but doesn’t try to talk to him about anything. I told her that’s her husband, not her boyfriend so if she wanted to keep living like that the rest of her life then that’s on her but she can’t complain when she’s not trying to seek solutions, I mean she married the dude and he doesn’t live up to a single expectation of hers, why would she marry him?. She got mad at me for saying that and didn’t respond. I mean, am I wrong for thinking she’s also in the wrong bc she was/is fully capable of making a change for herself if she’s so unhappy?? At a certain point you are no better for not making any changes, especially when she thinks he’s hindering their child from progressing when he’s already behind.