The closest and only family we have nearby to watch our toddler (2 years old) when I go to the hospital to have baby #2 in a few months are my husband’s parents. They love my son very much and are healthy and can run around with him in the backyard, etc., my son is comfortable with them. The only thing is the food and some safety stuff. They raised my husband in another country in deep poverty so the things we have now, like the toys and food, are new to them. My FIL also was very hands off with my husband as a baby so this is really his first time watching a baby/toddler. My FIL will cut his food with a sharp steak knife and leave the knife on the high chair tray. He loads up my son’s fork and my son will try to eat the whole bite and then sit there with a mouth completely filled with food and he encourages him to try and swallow it. He also gave him black caffeinated tea with cake when he was around 1.5 years old and I had to explain why we don’t give him caffeine.

They also lack what I think is common sense in some areas, for example I have always asked them to not bring latex balloons here bc they can pop and if he eats a piece it can be fatal. I say this bc they brought a pack of balloons, my FIL blew one up so big that it popped in my son’s face, and none of them thought to look for the latex pieces that went around the room. I was the only one searching for the pieces and they seemed completely unconcerned. This was when my son was about 1 year old and crawling and putting things in his mouth. Yesterday they came over for his birthday and we had foil balloons which do not have the same safety risk as latex, and my MIL asked me why am I allowed to have foil balloons if she can’t bring latex, and I had to explain to her that the foil isn’t latex and wouldn’t get stuck in his throat. It just seemed like common sense to me?

They just seem to have absolutely no regard for choking hazards and it really scares me. My MIL took a grandparent safety class that my own mom recommended she take. I asked them to both take an infant/child cpr class before babysitting my son overnight, but they refused and looked up some random YouTube videos instead, which clearly didn’t help teach them.

My FIL is extremely stubborn and my husband corrects him when something clearly unsafe is happening but my FIL ignores him over and over until my husband has to raise his voice or remove my son.

Should I ask them to take a specific or class? Is there anything I can do to help them learn food/choking safety before they’re babysitting my son for a few days straight? I plan to leave a print out of food that’s safe and not safe to give him and put it on the fridge and at the table. If I’m still uncomfortable when the time comes, my husband can just stay with me for the labor/delivery and then go home to be with his parents and our son for the rest of my hospital stay.

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