Throwing 8 year old twins separate birthday parties?

Question

I have twin daughters that are turning 8 next month. I usually do their parties together but one of my daughters ends up not liking her party. They are twins but so different. Best way to explain it is for Halloween one of my twins was princess peach, and the other one was her own version of the grim reaper. One of my daughters has always gravitated towards darker things. My husband introduced her to a cartoon show he watched when he was a kid called growing up creepie and also Edgar snd Ellen. She loves stuff like that. Every year we do a princess party and she dislikes it. I just do it because it's easy to throw together and one of my twins loves princesses. But my other one hates them. My husband said we could throw them separate parties. That makes me sad. I know they will want separate parties when they are older, but 8 just feels so young for them to already be separating from each other.
Edit: My husband's idea was one has a party on one weekend the other has it the next.

Answer

It’s sad that she’s never liked her birthday party and you’ve always chosen to do what the other twin likes because it’s “easy” ☹️ it’s time to let that babygirl feel seen, heard and understood 🖤

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Can you just have one party but split the theme? Like half the house be what each likes and then their own cake? They are individuals but also it would be a bit silly to have two totally different parties.

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Damn. Can you imagine having that many birthday parties where you didn’t feel it was about you at all. It was only catered to your twin. Stop making the day that is supposed to be about BOTH of them into something for YOU. It’s more sad that your daughter can’t have a bday that’s about things SHE enjoys and is only about you and what’s easiest. You have to separate them, sure they are twins, but they are their own person. With different styles and feelings and wants and needs. And it’s not about you.

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Of course you do different parties. They’re different people. This isn’t even a question. The minute they had different groups of friends different parties should have happened. If they have the same friends, themes should have stopped. Your poor daughter.

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So I have 2 girls whose birthdays are just 6 days apart. We have a big family so the girls have a combined party. I do 2 different themes for the party 🤷🏼‍♀️ I do one theme our younger daughter likes and one our older daughter likes to make it fair. My one daughter gets a cake in whatever she likes and my other daughter gets a cake in whatever she wants. It’s not that hard.

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I’m currently pregnant with twin girls, and definitely plan on treating them as 2 different people. We will not dress them the same, make them like the same things, we will encourage them to make their own sets of friends, and certainly be letting them choose what they want to do on their special day, even if we have to have them celebrate on 2 different days. Taking the easy way out is bull. Parenting isn’t easy, but you try to make your children feel heard and seen. I hope you do better from now on

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I would suggest this year, make one birthday and make it about the child who has always been left out. Let the other twin also learn what sacrifice this twin had to have for all these years. Because if you do two parties, the twin that has always been left out will still feel like u would rather go through the work of having two parties to accommodate her sister yet all these years you had the princess parties because it was easy. Mean as it sounds, u need to more than throw her a party of her own, u need to choose her over the other twin just this once as u have always chosen the other twin. Then next year you can throw 2 parties or when they are 10. Why didn’t you from the get go alternate themes each year or do half dark half princess? Or combine fairy tales that have both princess and dark witches and the likes? That way both are happy and u throw one party.

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I think it would be a great idea to have 2 parties!

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As a twin, I 100% support having two parties for them. It give them a chance to be individuals. Really though, itll just be two parties for both of them (unless they have different friends). It can also get expensive.    You could also avoid themes for the party itself and get two themed cakes. You could just get generic "happy birthday" stuff. Or if possible, do two themes. Draw a line down the middle so to speak.    Growing up, my sister and I were always "the twins". It was never our names. We shared everything, including a bed room for 15 years. We sort of got lucky though, she was held back in kindergarten. We had different friend groups. We were still just "the twins" to family and friends of the family.

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They’re twins!! How are they going to have separate parties? I mean you can have separe theme for each, 2 different cakes, different balloons etc. You are the parent and yes you can make them choose to their best interest because they’re different. 
I’m a twin and my mom always dressed us the same even underwear! The parties the cakes even the gifts were the same! We liked it I remember. What I didn’t like was to see one gift bag for both of us. People tend to think that we are the same and our identity can be difficult in those growing years because there’s always one independent and the other dependent. It’s great that you’re considering different for each but celebrate together 👯‍♀️

Throwing 8 year old twins separate birthday parties?

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