How do you announce a pregnancy sensitively?

Question

My sister-in-law can't have kids and is crushed about it. My other sister-in-law has been trying for two years. My last sister-in-law (my husband's brother's wife) needs IVF but can't afford it.
My husband and I got pregnant the first time before they all knew about their issues. We had no trouble, and got pregnant our second cycle with our second (currently incubating, due in August). 
I have no clue how to even start to tell them. His mom even told us not to have a second because it would break their hearts. We said we're not going to give up our dreams for other people's feelings and she called us "heartless". Even before they went through their stuff we knew we wanted three kids each 4 years apart. 
We're usually quite close but I don't know what to do here.

Answer

Ya asking you to not have kids because others in the family can't is WAY over stepping...and thats coming from someone who had hige fertility issues. She can warn you they may be upset but to say no more is too far. I'd tell them in a low.key way myself like "hey just wanted to let you know I am pregnant, didnt wanna have you hear it from someone else". That's what I would do personally. If you aren't comfortable with that maybe tell their spouse and have them tell them so if they are upset it is private. But you can't be expected to not live a certain life because others have things gping on. My oldest sister sidter had 4 kids in the time we tried for our 1st and finally succeeded via ivf we saved for for 4 yrs....would never have imagined wanting her to not have kids because we may not be able to. I was happy for her and loved my neices and nephews. Made me a little sad but thats life. Hopefully they understand they can't prevent others happiness because they have something going on in life thats hard.

Answer

Tell them the way you want. 
As someone who was disowned at 20 by my entire extended family because I got pregnant and my cousin couldn’t at the time - they’ll act how they want regardless of your actions. Live your life.

Answer

One of my friends knew I was struggling to conceive so she told me via text first so I could process it and feel what I needed to feel before being happy for her next time I saw her. Not sure that would be enough for your family as it sounds like the jealousy might be too much, but it’s at least an idea.

Answer

I think it’s sweet how considerate of their feelings you’re trying to be. But honestly, I would just say tell them. There’s not really a “delicate” way to tell them because either way it’s not correcting the fact that they can’t get pregnant right now. I know you wouldn’t rub it in their faces, but if they’re going to be saddened by your news, they would be sad regardless of how you announce it. Your mil was weird for that comment and it’s unrealistic. Making you feel guilty for continuing to live your life is ridiculous. You deserve to be excited without feeling bad. Sure it may be hard, but I’m sure they’d be happy for you. Congratulations, wishing you a safe pregnancy and delivery!

Answer

It’s nice of you to be considerate of their feelings, but ultimately no matter how you tell them, they’re likely going to be sad for themselves. And that’s fine, don’t expect a huge celebration, but I would expect them to eventually process their initial feelings and come around. Ultimately your fertility isn’t in spite of theirs, and a new baby is a happy thing for the family. Keep your plan, have the kids you want to have, you can’t let someone else’s misfortune change the course of your life. And if they truly care about you, they’re likely wouldn’t ask you to do that.

Answer

We told my SIL by phone....she was clearly upset and said 'AGAIN????' and ended the conversation. But I felt that was the best way to do it, either by phone or text...not in person or her finding out from someone else or social media.

Answer

They'll be happy for you but sad for themselves and there really isn't a way around that. Maybe tell them in a private setting and in a more conversational way than a big announcey way. And just acknowledge it "we know you love us and we know you also may have some difficult feelings around this too."

Answer

Just tell them flat out and congratulations

How do you announce a pregnancy sensitively?

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