Fears in pregnancy

Okay I can’t be the only one right 😭😭

I fear everything in life half the time 😅

(yes, I have severe anxiety.. developed after having my first daughter..)

I read and read for no reason sometimes on this this app of peoples random post, when my kids are in school or sleeping.. I came across a post.. That has had me horribly terrified this whole pregnancy so far.. I’m only 14weeks…

AFE… Amniotic fluid embolism…

It had haunted even my dreams.. I’m absolutely terrified. I know it’s rare. But can still happen! This is my 4th baby… last 2 births have been crazy/trauma… Someone help me. I’m going insane looking everything up. This thing especially! I can’t talk to my family or friends because most have no idea what I’m even talking about..

Back story on the 2 trauma births …

My middle daughter , the doctor tore my uterus and I hemorrhaged.. Lost A LOT of blood. Almost needed a transfusion.

My youngest.. no one listened to me when cried to the doctors telling them I was in labor and they sent me home… She had trisomy 21 and holes in her heart. Had her almost in my car but found the nearest ER.. Had her in the emergency room all by myself basically (no one was trained).. She got stuck. They ripped my poor girl out n broke her shoulder just about. She was shipped to another hospital instantly. And for 55days she was bouncing between PICU/NICU..