What Indirect Message Could I...

What indirect message could I be sending?

Almost everyone I know will try to walk all over me. From cutting me off while I'm talking. Dismissing my concerns. Not apologizing or acknowledging their behavior. Will do things without asking or just tell me they're going to do vs. making sure I am okay with it.

I'm in no way the type of person to have a victim complex. I have faults and flaws as well.

To a degree, I understand why most people I know (mainly family) do it. I allowed it for so long (learned behavior as a child being told to shup and that my feelings and opinions didn't matter) and since then I've of course put my foot down and demanded my respect. Doing that has caused a lot of distance with me and my family for about 5 years now. We still talk and hang out, but they're more respectful. Except for 1 person, and it's just a work in progress.

Yesterday, as I'm sitting and chatting with my new neighbor (met maybe 6 or 7 months ago)...I'm in the midst of telling her something...She cuts me off to talk about a similar situation that happened to her. Um, okay, no problem. I attempted to speak, and she dismissed me and then says wait let me finish!!"

Instead of becoming upset...It made me wonder...what message am I sending that has caused (from the past) and still causing others to think they can talk to me however they want or be rude to me.

At times, I can be really soft spoken, I'm really reserved and often quiet. I listen more than I talk usually.

I consider myself to be friendly and welcoming, but I seem to keep meeting people who think my quietness is a weakness or something.

I'm 32 by the way and seriously asking... how the hell do I officially change this within myself so that as I continue to meet people, I will attract better people and not be perceived as someone with no backbone??

This is what it feels like. I'm not saying it's fact.

I've tested the waters and treated 2 of these people the way they've treated me, and it was hell and astounding how upset they became. I've mentioned that they've it done, so I figured it was okay to do back.

Lol, help, please.

Thanks.