Was I in the wrong? First time baby advice

Okay so backstory

-husband and I said we were going to minimize electronics/loud sounds etc with baby for the first few years. Everyone was fine w this.

-for my shower, my sister (18, I’m 26) got this huge bouncer with loads of electronics and flashy lights and loud sounds. I politely asked her after the shower if she wouldn’t mind returning it and she could either get the bouncer on my registry which was more puzzle oriented or, she could get something herself. She said she would get the bouncer and I thought all was well.

-a bit of time goes by. My bff who’s been my bff for 10 years asks if I need help w the baby room. I say OF COURSE bc I do. she gets w my mom and they plan a day to come up and help. My sister texts me saying I’m “rude af” for inviting my friend and not her, and that she’s not gonna get the bouncer bc her nephew doesn’t get one if I wasn’t appreciative the first time around. And there’s no research that loud sounds are bad for baby (which I never claimed there to be, I just said we were going to minimize electronics for the first few years).

I tell her I don’t care about the $ and I do feel bad about asking her to return it but we made it clear we didn’t want certain items and it would have been worse to let $100 go to waste than offer it back to her or give her the option to get a dif one we would use. I also said that while the $ isn’t important, the mentality of withholding from my kid bc of my decision is, and it concerns me and hurts me (I have family members that would take out parents decisions on the kids and it was sad). I also told her that I didn’t invite my friend, my friend invited herself, and that I didn’t mean to leave her out but she hasn’t once asked me how I’m feeling or if she could help out with anything and the one time I did ask her to stay with me while my husband was on business she showed up wayyyyyyy late and came from a party, so i figured she was living her college life and wouldn’t be interested in a nursery and I just involve the people who seem to want to be involved.

She said I was insulting and horrible and rude and she was going to take space for a bit. My mom wants me to empathize with her and says she’s just 18 and isn’t mature enough and didn’t mean it. I’m not mad at her at all but I didn’t feel like I was rude about addressing my feelings? Like I totally get being 18 but at 18 I also didn’t expect everyone to cater to me, though I do understand the maturity. Thoughts? Should I apologize?