It feels like everyone is pregnant
I recently suffered a miscarriage on December 8th at 6 weeks. Even though I wasn't that far along, it was devestating and heart wrenching. What's made it even worse is the abundant amount of birth announcements I've seen on Facebook and have celebrated with my friends. Two very close friends are both due in mid July..... A week before I was supposed to be due. It just feels like a cruel slap in the face. Every.Time.
I'm so happy for them and I'm trying my best to think positively and move forward but it's hard. Tonight we were at a wedding. I took advantage and made sure to have a few drinks, enjoy the tuna tartar at cocktail hour, and order my meat rare because I want to soak up this time in my life and state that I'm in- the inbetween. The mourning. The 'regrouping'. It's a shitty state to be in. But it's where I'm at and I need to embrace it. When AF shows up, I know we'll dust ourselves off and try again. But for now, I'm celebrating me and the small (tiny, really) luxuries of not being pregnant... Because it's the only thing that's getting me through.
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