I recently posted about breaking up with my boyfriend and then getting back with him a few hrs later. A lot of people told me to leave and I do think I should. And I did because the thoughts if the texts I saw with the other girls kept popping up in my head.

At first I was happy that he said he would fight for me. And I accepted it because that means he cares right? But it feels a lot like he feels guilty and wants to soothe his conscience.

So I decided if he wants to fight and prove to me that he truly wants me then he should first figure out why he ever thought flirting and texting and talking to other girls seemed like a good idea to him. Why is it when he’s thinking of me everyday would he text these girls and compliment them everyday, let them send him pictures and even call him? Calling them baby etc. he’s never met with any of them but then again they’re in another country.

He said he had spent some time thinking about it and he says it’s because he didn’t value me and my love for him and because of my nature had taken that love for granted. Is it because I’m too nice, too patient or did I allow him too much freedom in our relationship?

He says he wants to prove to me that he can be a better man . I told him he can do that and I will respond but I won’t be the same person as his girlfriend, there will be no sex, I will not stay at is place and I won’t put my trust in him or rely on him. If he wants to prove it to me, we’re starting from scratch. And while we’re apart he should work on himself to see why he feels the need to cheat. I told him he loves me but clearly not enough because what he won’t give me I’m sure someone else will. We have some monetary transactions that tie us together so I can’t immediately stop or completely lessen communicating with him either because I don’t want him to just disappear.

The thing about this situation is now I have anxiety, what if I allow him the opportunity and he doesn’t end up actually making it up to me and waste my time in the end. I wouldn’t plan on being monogamous or anything because I’m single now but obviously my heart would be rooting for him because were together in the first place. And he’s more familiar than starting all over again. What if in the end I can’t forgive it? I’m not afraid of being alone. I’m still young but I am afraid of not giving someone the chance to prove they can be different and reap the benefits of that.

In addition he asked me if we can meet to talk about everything , I told him no but I really have a lot of questions I need answered. Do you think I should meet with him?

I was also wondering, has anyone ever given a cheating ex an opportunity to win back your affection, was it a waste of your time or did he prove his affections and love to you?