It’s been 3 months since my diagnosis and it’s still such a struggle mentally. Worse part about it is that idk who gave it to me; that person may have knowingly taken my choice to decide from me. I’m so angry. Livid now because I think I’ve now passed it on to my bf. I’ve been careful not to be intimate with him during the breakout but I think I saw a symptom. I’m scared he’ll look at me different now. He didn’t want to accept or hear about my diagnosis and hopefully in part because I just kept breaking down in tears destroying myself. But I think I’ve passed it on to him and now he has to go through this too. What if he doesn’t want to go thru this with me because of how he’s going to look at himself. That his love for me, does change? I can’t sleep knowing I’m the reason he would have it. We’ve been faithful to one other for our relationship and it’s been wonderful, but what if we can’t get passed this together. I feel alone; ashamed; dirty.

Just don’t understand why it isn’t include in testing! And if it’s so common, why the bad stigma around it?