Stop caring what people think

Your life is not a Democracy, stop carrying people's opinions on your shoulder. In general, let people think whatever they want about politics, religion and world views. Unless they are actually hurting people, who cares if your FIL thinks all men should get a paternity test, especially if you don't even have kids (A story I read here). Stop stressing over factors and opinions out of your control. If listening to uncle Marty talk about Trump and Biden stresses you out, simply remove yourself, Stop trying to make people think like you. What are you expecting to happen "Oh gosh Jacklyn you're right, you have totally changed my mindset." You really think that's gonna happen?

People you love?

Be open to feedback but make your own decisions. If you have to choose between disappointing someone else and disappointing yourself, be ok with disappointing others. Follow the career YOU want, do what makes you happy. My mom worked in hospice for 10 years, dying patients would say the thing they regretted the most was not living the life that was genuine and authentic to them in fear of disappointing others. Many of them lived the life expected for them or lived the life their parents didn't get to live in order to make them happy. THAT IS NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY, nor is it fair to you. You want to be a teacher even though everyone in your family are lawyers? Do what makes you happy. You don't want kids but your parents want grand-children? Do what makes you happy. Your family is ultra religious and doesn't believe in divorce even thought you have a trash of a husband? Make the decisions that are good for you, your church members aren't gonna be there every time you cry yourself to sleep because your husband is a cheater, and abusive partner.

Everywhere you go, there you are. You can't outrun yourself, therefore be the person you want to be when you look in the mirror.

Other people?

If they haven't walked in your shoes, they don't get to have an opinion on the steps you take.

I got canceled on social media last year, there were hundreds of vile and hateful comments about me. Did it faze me? Absolutely not, not even one bit, I don't respect those people therefore I don't respect their opinion. People thought I would address it, but they are clowns if they expect me to give losers on the Internet any sort of attention. My energy is valuable and I don't spend it just anywhere.

No one above you is coming for you, that means, people actually working towards goals and trying to better themselves will never spend their precious time tearing people down.

Remember, if someone (your friend, your coworker, your classmate) doesn't give constructive and valid advice "Hey Jen, I noticed you were late on the assignment, here's what helps me tadada", but instead comes from a mean-spiritted place "Wow, you're sooo brave for wearing that, I mean I would never but you do you. You're just quirky, wow", they are speaking from their own bad place. Don't let other people's bad place be YOUR bad place. They're just projecting how they feel about themselves.

Lastly, get really clear on the life you want. It's a lot easier for critisism to get to you when you're just a kite in the wind and you don't know what you're doing.

Get granular in what you want for yourself, it'll be a lot easier to stand your ground when you're crystal clear about what you want, "Mom, I love you and I understand you're worried about me not getting married anytime soon, I know it comes from a place of you wanting me to be safe, secure and taken care of, just know that I'm working toward getting all of those needs met, all on my own. I would rather do the heavy lifting than settle for someone for the sake of not being alone. I'm not alone, I have you and just know that you've raised me strong enough for me to make these decisions on my own."

Sorry for the long rant, I hope it helps at least one person.