In need of relationship advice/AITA or in the wrong?

Prepare, because this one is a doozy.

For context, My partner (32m) and I (26f) have been in a relationship for roughly 2 years. When I met him I was just getting out of a marriage and didn’t want anything serious. I told him this and also let him know I’d be talking to other people since I need to get used to dating. He said he understood and is also talking to other women. We spent every day together and I really grew to like him. About a month into us seeing each other I asked if he wanted to be in an exclusive relationship. He said yes. A few months pass and unfortunately I forgot to delete some old conversations from previous interests while I was seeing my boyfriend, who wasn’t my boyfriend at the time. He freaked out and said I cheated on him and I’m a liar. Ever since, our relationship was pretty rocky. We broke up for about a month but still saw each other and eventually got back together. Our relationship improved tremendously but every so often would accuse me of cheating on him with no evidence. His trust in me grew but not as much as I thought it did. My current issue w him is this: he has an issue with my best friends roommate (22m). He thinks he’s really stupid and wants to have sex with me. He had so much of an issue with him that I had to dodge my best friend for months when she’d invite us over to their new apartment. Never giving straight answers and just being shady. We were at an event with all of them for about an hour and a half when my partner had to use the restroom. When he left, said roommate said hi to me. (More context I used to work with him and my best friend) so he personally knows me but not my partner. I told my partner about this bc he likes to know these things and out of respect for him I told him with out hesitation. He then told me he doesn’t want to be around the roommate anymore. On our way home I asked him what I should say to my friend. This time I wanted to be direct with her. Address the problem head on. My partner got mad I kept asking him what he’d like me to say when I was just trying to be proactive and say something my partner would be ok with. He freaked out! Told me I was nagging him and to stop talking and asking questions. The next day we talked about what we should do if she invites us over. He told me he still didn’t know and would address it when it happens. This girl is my best friend. We’d been dodging her for months and I felt horrible about how we were acting. So, I decided to tell her against my partners wishes. I messaged her and all I said was the truth. My partner wasn’t comfortable with the roommate and that we will not be around if he’s there. My friend was hurt but understanding and grateful I told her. I told her to keep it between us and she did. A couple weeks later my partner asked to get on my phone. I had no problem with it and handed it over. He went into my recently deleted messages and saw I had deleted her chat. He asked me why and if there is something I didn’t tell him about. At first I didn’t remember why so I said no, you can recover them. Before he did that I remembered almost immediately after why I deleted it and told him the truth. He lost his mind. Calling me a liar and a cheater. I have never cheated on this man. He is my absolute world. He said I broke his trust and that we are over. He made me take all of my stuff out of my room and move it into the spare bedroom. He is refusing to talk to me or even understand why I did what I did. He messaged my mother, who he isn’t even close to, just to tattle on the behavior I’ve had after he broke up with me. I shouldn’t have hid what I did but I really don’t think this warrants a break up. He told me he was planning on proposing with in 6 months just a few weeks ago and I’m potentially pregnant right now. Our relationship had been going great for a while but then this happened and I’m worried I lost my partner for good. He told me that he won’t take me back and has barely spoken to me in 3 days. Am I the asshole?