He said that I am temporary girl

I have been seeing a guy for 3 months, almost live together, have a good $ex and he has husband vibes but he tells everyone that I am a friend. I have feelings for him but he said pls don't love me, Love spoils everything and i'm just a temporary girl and just let's continue as it was. I don't know where my self-esteem is 🤦🏼‍♀️ I am still lying next to him and writing this. what can I do? Need advice