I feel like I have no one to talk to so Glow is my friend, lol. Anyways, yesterday my husband and I of 4 years got into a super huge argument about me accidentally spilling juice on his medication and long story short he ended up throwing a hot cup of coffee on me (I'm 6 weeks pregnant) in front of our 3 year old daughter. This is not the 1st time one of our arguments has ended badly but this time I'm choosing to walk away. I just can't do it anymore. So it looks like I'm going to be raising 2 children on my own.

We've been bickering back and forth for the last couple of days. He's told his mom, I seen the text and he told me to my face, "I'm tired of this bitch". He keeps saying the baby I'm carrying is not his All he keeps saying is that I wanna let my mom run my life and I'm a hoe because I stepped out in our marriage once. I know that was wrong and I've constantly apologized and done everything I can to get him to trust me again. He told me to delete all social media, I did, he told me don't hang out with friends, I did, i was registered for school to be a medical assistant and him and his family told me i need to stay home and watch our daughter so i did, i don't even talk to my family as much as I used to but all he brings up are the mistakes I made in the past. It's frustrating because I never know what little thing will set him off and get him upset. It's like I walk on eggshells everyday.

I'm honestly just freaking out. I never expected my life to be like this. I never thought I would have to raise 2 kids on my own. I don't even know where to begin. I'm a disabled vet, no job, my house is in foreclosure, my car is about to be repossessed, I've already been diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I feel way in over my head. I've even thought about abortion but my heart just won't let me do it. My children are my only saving grace. They, even with one not even here yet, are my purpose for life.