Did I overreact by crying because of my boyfriends comments ?

Context: I (21F) am the eldest of 3 kids. I pretty raised my siblings from the age of 10 as my mother was single and being an immigrant with no higher education resorted to working as a cleaner. My father was physically and mentally abusive. There were times were he would beat my mother up right in front of me. I would have to take my siblings into the other room and come back to scream at him to stop. After disappointing me year after year, (the most notable was promising to come to a daddy and daughter dance and he stood me up and also promising to come to my brothers, daddy and son craft day and also standing him up and I had to step in as my brother was not able to calm down and return to class), disappearing for weeks at a time coming back with gifts to make up for being gone, it all added up to me despising him. I made sure to hide his horrible nature from my siblings and when they finally separated. I made sure to help my mum with anything as she worked late nights. I would do the school run (before and after school) once i went into secondary school (age 11) all the way until my sister (7 year age gap) also went to secondary school. I would make dinner, help them with their homework and extracurriculars, put them to bed and then start my homework going to bed at 12 or 1 am to wake up for 6am. Through the years, I would help my mother apply for jobs as being a cleaner was hard and we wanted to aim for more especially as she was struggling for money quite a lot and she is now a nurse assistant and she has come a long way from being a cleaner, warehouse worker, mobile carer and now nurse assistant and I couldn’t be more proud.

But after all these years, my siblings now look to me for guidance and listen to me when they do wrong so much that my mother says that they are more my kids than hers, I am quite worn out and have never had a male role model and I have been my own father all my life and became very hyper independent. Most men, wanted to sleep with me but luckily I never fell for the trap and kept my virginity until it was with someone that I trusted: my boyfriend (26m) who I met last year.

Fast forward to now, me and my boyfriend were talking about having kids in the future and I mentioned that I would prefer that the month after Ive given birth, don’t want anyone visiting me except my mother and his. And he asked why his younger sister (23f) couldn’t visit and I said that id prefer women that have given birth and raised kids to be around me. And he said “what if she gives birth before you” and then straight away said God forbid. I followed by saying why shes older than me and he backtracked saying that him and his father will always view her as a baby. This hurt me as how does he view me, that it is okay for me to give birth before his sister who is older than me. Ive never had an older brother or father and let alone one who feels like this about me. He’s also said comment like this before that his sister deserves nothing but the best (as he didn’t like her boyfriend who was toxic and was a ‘bad influence’ as he smoked and did drugs sometimes) which I agreed with but I asked him what about me do I deserve the best as he has a drug abuse history that I was helping him through and smoked as I’ve never smoked anything from weed to cigarettes or balloons and have never and never will touch drugs. He saw that his comment upset me when he realised that his younger sister was older than me and asked if it did but I said no and turned over trying to distract myself from tears, he tried to hug me but I asked for a minute to myself.

Did I overreact