This can't be normal...

Who here has a 12 year old girl?

This will be long...I just need some insight on this...

I have a 12 year old daughter. She's a great kid. She's sweet, thoughtful, creative and goofy. She's awesome...

But for the past year I've been having problems out of her...she has started to lie. Blatantly. To my face. Little unnecessary lies. Big lies. Fantastic lies.

Example: Little lie - I was sitting in my room when all of a sudden I started to smell cotton candy. I yell, "Who is spraying that body spray?" She was supposed to be cleaning the bathroom. The spray was in the bathroom. She goes "Nobody I just moved it." So I walk down the hall to bathroom and I'm like..."How do I smell it all the way in my room if you just 'moved it' ?". She stood in my face and said "I moved it from here to the shelf." So I asked, "I can't smell a moved perfume. You have to SPRAY it or open it to smell it way down the hall." We argued like that for about five minutes before she finally admitted that she in fact sprayed it. I asked her why would she lie like that to me...she said because she didn't want to get in trouble for spraying it when she knew she was supposed to be doing her chore. So she knew FULL WELL what she was doing and why yet she STILL does it and then tried to lie her way out of it. When the proof was right in the air!!!

Big lie: Her teacher called to tell me that she had forged my signature on a homework document. I was livid!!! Not only did she forge it, she had two other students in on it who gave her the idea! She hasn't been turning in assignments at all or on time so she got a warning letter sent home to the parents to sign, to notify us of this I guess. Well, she decided to forge my signature on it and turn it in. The teacher knew it was bullshit because I'm a hands on parent. I'm at the school. I'm emailing. I'm texting. Me and the teacher communicate often. So the teacher knew that there was no way I was ok with or even KNEW about her missing assignments because she knows I'm not going for that. So there were two letters sent home by my daughter. One to notify me of the missing assignments, and one to notify me of a final warning and deadline to turn in the assignments to get the credit for it. She forged BOTH!!!

I dont understand this. I don't understand why she is doing this. She is well taken care of. She is loved. Why? If we don't stop this now what will it be next? Boys? Pregnancy? Drugs?

A little background....

Her father isn't exactly "in" her life. He lives in Florida. We live in Illinois. Me and her father were high school sweethearts but broke up when she was a few months old. I met my now SO when she was 4 and he's been her father ever sense. Her biological father calls her, but barely. Not enough in my opinion. He only sends money every month and has only seen her about 5 times in her whole life. He came last year in Feb. for her birthday and he plans on coming this year. I talk to her constantly about if this is bothering her and she says no. She knows she can come talk to me or her step dad about this but she's says she's fine. I guess my question is...Could this be bothering her? Her father not being in her life? I guess I thought she was fine cause she has me and her step dad and he loves her just like his own and we have a seven year old son together. He doesn't treat them any differently except the fact that she's a girl and she's older than her brother. She has her own room. She gets an extra hour before bedtime but she has more chores, more responsibilities. Like picking her brother up from school and changing the cat litter. Normal stuff. We're trying to teach her responsibility so she's baby sitting now and has a house key and a flip phone, no smart phone yet because she's not responsible enough and there's too much crap on the internet anyway. I don't see what we're doing wrong. Is this just normal tween behavior? I'm struggling with this. We've taken away her things. Grounded her. Nothing seems to be working. She will still lie in our faces. Shes also started to be mean to her brother. Like ignoring him when he tries to talk to her or purposely stepping on his toy soldiers. Shes NEVER been like this towards him. Its very frustrating. Its starting to affect the whole family because She's always grounded so we can't do things as a family cause she's left out. We can't just leave her home alone all the time while we go bowling or to the movies and out to dinner. We don't know what else to do. 😳😳😳😳😳