Getting anxious about birth

Just wanted a little rant. 39+5 hospital won’t induce until 41w. He keeps getting bigger, he isn’t in the right position (back is more towards the left) my last son my partner thinks he remembers him coming out face up-ish. I was in labor for ages, pushing for like two hours, they had to give me an episiotomy and use a suction cup, I can’t believe the force they were using to pull him out, again and again. He was 4 days late.

Just needed to word vomit. 🤮