So my husband and I are in our late 20s we’ve been together since 2013. We have 5 kids and legit don’t have sex anymore. We got pregnant last year from the first time in 4 months. Since having the baby we’ve done it 2x and it was because I’m at the point of threatening to find a side dude(I wouldn’t but I’m getting to be a bitch at this point and saying whatever)

When we do have sex there’s 0 romance. Lasts 5 minutes max. He doesn’t care to try to turn me on it’s on his time and it’s like I’m just being used. It really decreased in times when he got a new job. I was in nursing school so I brushed it off but we’d still have sec like once a week sometimes more. The night we got married it felt like a chore and he made himself jb it was our wedding night. Since then it’s been so rare that his stamina is nonexistent. I’ve tried talking to him nicely. I’ve told him how we need to work on it. I’ve talked about sex therapy, I’ve asked if he’s just not emotionally ok thinking he’s depressed…? Even concidered him cheating because he has to be getting it somewhere right….? He just says he’s tired. He will fall asleep during foreplay…. Me to him and him to me….. he never asks or talks about it. He turns it around on me a lot that I never try to touch him but that’s not true I used to try all the time he’d fall asleep or if I did too much sex would be 2 pumps and done. He has no problem getting it up or keeping it up it’s just I feel he doesn’t want to. It never was like this before we had kids. Before kids we did it all the time 2x a day sometimes more. Now it’s nothing. My breaking point was the other night he was rubbing me (that NEVER turns into anything it’s usually 5 minutes of attention to say he gave me attention) he then pokes me I tell him grab lube as I’m not ready in the least bit then he goes to bed. I don’t know what to do. We have a great marriage otherwise. Just we have no sex life and when we do have sex it honestly sucks.

Also I got myself a toy and he threw it away saying it’s not right.

Please give me advice. I’m to the point I’m getting mean.