I can’t fall in love anymore (RANT)

I was with my ex husband about 3 years… we got divorced last year. ( we were separated for a while though ) When we officially called it quits he got a new gf about 2 months later… my dumbass still waited for him and stayed single. They didn’t work out, I had barely started school when he came back trying to work things out but I couldn’t go back not only was I not able to forgive him, but his mom and I got into a big argument she lied on me… I HATE HIS MOM. ( I know it doesn’t make sense because I just said I was waiting for him. I thought I was actually going to forgive him and forget everything we’ve been through but when the moment came of me making a decision of giving it another try I realized I couldn’t trust him) 4 months later he’s already living with another girl. I decided to give my self a chance and start dating again. I did I met this guy but I literally couldn’t anymore after 6 months of dating. Stayed single for a while I got In contact with this dude I met back in high school and at first I thought i liked him but now I realized I don’t. I just don’t get how my ex husband has a whole new family and I’m just here w my son…. I can’t move on. There’s no way I would get back with him I don’t even think I love him anymore…. I just can’t be anyone else right now, and honestly I do want a family I want a long lasting relationship. Idk what to do …