Words of encouragement?

I have always found out I’m pregnant on 10dpo.. 3 pregnancies - always 10dpo. I have had two losses, one miscarriage, then my successful daughter and then a chemical after her… tomorrow I am 10dpo. Negative on every test so far… I am hoping tomorrow is the day… I want this so bad. And I can’t help but knock the negative thoughts every time this happens that, “I always think this is the month” and it never is.. i am so scared for the sadness that will occur tomorrow if that test has no faint line.. I know I know, I am not “technically” out but given my history, I feel I will be… just hoping somebody can give me encouragement or relate or something! I wish I could fall asleep already so the day can end and I can just wake up and test!!