I lose friends easily bc I feel that I’m never really that important to them?

Maybe that’s self centered of me to claim but I distance myself when the friendship feels one sided. Or they act weird when they become friends with certain people and it’s like I never really mattered. I had this happen a few times and I notice people sometimes just leave you on the back burner or invite you out to make themselves look good like they have a big friend group but don’t include you in anything else otherwise.

Idk maybe I’m being petty but I decided to reach out to a friend who recently gave birth. I said congratulations and asked how she was doing and if she needs help or if anything was up. She never replied and it’s been a couple days. I get she has a new baby but I feel like it’s not that hard to find spare time to reply to a text message? Like I’ve noticed that before I’d text her and then when we did hangout she’d admit to texting guys during the attempt I had made to message her which basically meant she was on her phone and she just didn’t feel like replying to my text message.

And I feel like this is the same thing, maybe I had said something wrong before hand? The last thing I said before that message was like when she told me she was being induced I was like oh wow those induction contractions are no joke! Hopefully you get an epidural fast!

I said this because I’ve been induced before and it hurt like hell. And the epidural barely worked anyway. Idk if that offended her because she didn’t reply to either message? So I essentially doubled texted her and didn’t get a reply. I’m not really that offended by it, it’s just I felt like I had worked up the courage to ask how she was doing like I did our other friend and our other friend at the time did reply after she had her baby. It was like oh I was too busy to respond.

And perhaps she’s too exhausted by taking care of the baby to reply or check her messages. Maybe that’s how it is for her when she gives birth? Idk I just know I was still able to text after I gave birth and post and everything. She also made a Facebook post so yeha she was on her phone lol the Facebook post was why I texted her since she posted celebrating the birth of her baby.

Maybe she’s mad I wasn’t there for her entire pregnancy? Not like she’s been there for mine, I’m pregnant right now and she hasn’t really asked how I was doing or how she could help. I don’t really care to see the baby either way, it’s not a ploy to see her baby but I was just trying to be nice.

And then the other friend where this happened with as well was a coworker. We had been loners who were friends together but she eventually got other friends. I wasn’t too upset by that but it became obvious she was tighter with them than she was with me. I say this because during work if she was upset she’d just tell me I don’t want to talk right now but then go on and excitedly talk to one of her other friends despite telling me that. It confused me because I guess Iwasn’t seen as “cool” enough to speak with even when she was feeling under the weather. And now they’re going on trips together and are closer than ever. While I’m on the outside as usual which she doesn’t have to invite me since we drifted apart due to her actions after getting these new friends. Like she’d not reply to text messages and just read them after claiming she was busy at work. Which I understand that but why just read the message and not reply if you’re that busy?

So I stopped being close with her because the friendship felt one sided. Now I basically have no close friends and it’s sad. Why does every friendship I have end up like this where we’re distant and strained? I used to be so close to the girl who just had her baby and she helped out with my first daughter a lot when we first met. Now it’s like she’s a stranger I barely know. Maybe it’s because of my job where I’m hardly off on weekends to hangout and then her mom blamed me getting a bf for me not hanging out as often when I work long hours and I’m just tired on my days off. So that’s why I barely hangout with anyone and I sometimes work weekends so that doesn’t help.

I’m hoping in the future to develop more solid friendships than the ones I have now. I feel like they’re a lost cause tbh and she had invited me over for Easter but now I’m debating on going since she hasn’t replied to my messages, I feel like it’s awkward showing up to Easter if she’s mad/upset by what I said.