Am I being selfish?

For the past few months my boyfriend and I have been exploring the adoption option for our baby. My heart was not into it so today at a meeting we had with our adoption agency I told the person we have that I'm keeping my baby. She then told my boyfriend while we were there and he shortly got up and left, leaving us there. He texted me and told me I am a coward for not telling him myself and that I was only looking out for myself and that I've ruined him. I chose to keep our baby because I know I can do it by myself (help from him would be nice, but not expecting it) and I would be completely ruined if I gave her up. I tried to convince myself that giving her up would be the best choice for both of us, but it wasn't for me. Because I chose to "ruin" him instead of myself, he says I'm selfish. Am I honestly being selfish or should I have chosen how he feels over how I feel? I told him I wanted to talk about how I feel with everything and he told me that since he had zero choices in keeping her then I don't have a right to talk to him about how I feel. I don't feel like that is fair, but maybe I'm not seeing it the way he is. I had our adoption person tell him because I was scared of his reaction, honestly. He can be a very mean person when he's angry with me. Because of him I feel like maybe I'm not making the right choice. Everyone always says to do what's right for you so I did that and it's turning out to be awful 😔 Of course I didn't expect him to be happy I couldn't go through with it, but I told him when we started looking into this that I was not 100% doing this. It was looking into it and seeing if I could've found something that made me feel better about the choice and I didn't. Every meeting we had I made this clear.