Just need to talk

Terresa🍼
So last month AF came CD27, today is CD26 and I have not tested yet because I'm nervous and don't want to end up disappointed before work. (I work in the operating room at the children's hospital) My BBs are sore but then again AF is due, idk. I might be out this cycle. My partner doesn't really understand how nerve racking this is. So I just keep everything inside. I've read everything I can get my hands on. (Probably making things worse)
I really want my BFP this cycle. We had a natural <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IUI</a> 12 October (no trigger or any other meds this cycle) which makes me think it's a no this cycle. 
Even my chart isn't clear. Granted my work schedule fluxuates so I try to take BBT around the same time each day but that has not been consistent. 
Well here's my chart; and thank you for letting me vent.