Hi Ladies!

You are so sweet to check in! I hope this finds you well with your little blessings now just over 1 year old! I cradle my 15 month old daughter so closely each day, holding her little hand knowing she will never be so little again!

I'm so grateful for your support in getting her into this world safely during such a stressful and exciting time!

I know my last update was filled with bewildered excitement and wonder as I was unexpectedly and miraculously pregnant with no planning or forethought. My lmp was 5/25/17. My doctors had advised me pregnancy was impossible seeing my last required IVF. I should have known better. My Doctors once advised my parents when I was an infant I wouldn't walk or run or have kids but many surgeries later I not only walked, I ran marathons successfully as well as danced and performed on stage. And I am blessed to be a mother of 2 amazing girls!

Sadly my update is not what we hoped or expected.

Please don't allow my next update to make you sad or scared or anxious. I only wish all things wonderful for all of you reading this.

I was pregnant. Which is a miracle in itself seeing my previous challenges. I felt pregnant; nausea, vomiting, fatigue, hunger, bloating, constant voiding, grouchiness, weight gain, and a notable pooch of a belly from failing to tone up my abs from my April 2016 baby.

Sometime around 9 weeks there was no further growth or development of a heartbeat. My MD informed me I would miscarry. I had travel plans, so the plan was to allow a natural m/c while I was away for 2 weeks. Nothing happened while I was away. When I returned we scheduled a nonsedated D&C; on Thursday before my next trip on 8/11.

Not what I expected. But I'm ok. Counting my blessings that I have my precious 5 year old and 15 month old.

Never let what you don't have interfere with what you do have.

I went to my MD's office by myself. My husband had meetings that am, and actually I do better on my own and prefer it that way. My best friend was going to pick me up, but her son became emergently hospitalized with seizures that morning so I met them at the hospital before my procedure. I went in, took my ibuprofen and Ativan. Afterwards I walked across the street to the mall and had my jewelry fixed at Tiffany's, picked up some new make up at Sephora and went to a nice spa for a massage, facial and personal time alone.

My family is enjoying a family get away in Maui now. The girls are having a blast and the resort has an amazing water attraction with water slides and kiddy pools galore...and I can't swim or take a bath for 4 weeks post D&C.; 🙁 To top it off I braved a swim suit and my husband who means well but just can't finesse messages quite well keeps mentioning how "you, I mean 'we', rally need to get back in shape and start working out more". It's just to soon to hear that. Even if it's true.

I feel a bit selfish being sad. I have so much to be grateful for. I follow up next week with my MD. We find strength through adversity and this has reinforced so many lessons.

I wish you all continued joy and blessings in the future! Heartfelt thanks for your support and concern.

BFP Due on May